Captain Roy

Today I am Captain Roy!!!  I have a gauze eyepatch to cover the shingles on my eyelid.  All brought about by my stress.  How do you not stress about looking for a job?  Yes, it is about that time.  When I drop Trystan off at daycare, Zoey tries to make a break for it so she can stay and play with everyone.  In my heart, I want to be able to put her in daycare with her brother, and I know that it will happen in God’s time.  I also know that there is a job out there just for me.  Two of my three long term jobs were well above my qualification and experience level, but someone took a chance on me and I was able to learn the ropes and get the job done.

My first job straight out of college was with Lockheed Martin Aeronautics as a Systems Engineer.  I pretty much learned everything I know about the engineering process with them as I was with them for almost 5 years.  I hopped around different departments, following the next big push.  I ended up as the Test Coordinator on the final phases of ground testing before the F-35’s first flight.

The next leap of faith was in Biometric Engineering.  I had no experience in Biometrics and bombed my first two technical interviews.  Yes, I had no clue what my future supervisor was talking about and admitted it.  I had no clue what my future manager was talking about; he just gave me IQ type problem solving questions, I had no answer.  Then Raluca, the second in command for the team interviewed me.  Little did I know that she took the leap of faith and pulled for me to get in.  My experience at Lockheed Martin with process management, change control and project planning helped me see the big picture and work more efficiently in a business that was trying to grow from a caterpillar to a butterfly.

In both of those high pressure and fast paced environments, I haven’t experienced as much stress as I have making sure that the house is clean, the kids are taken care of, the laundry is done, food is ready by dinner, and I at the same time I am staying true to my goal of writing 1000 words a day.  I cut my goal to 500 words a day and luckily, the 30 Days of Hustle assignment for today was to cut our goal in half.  What a relief!  The whole point was to relieve some stress off of you while you’re hustling to achieve your goals.  Thanks Jon Acuff!

Why do I want to write 1000, now 500 words a day?  Well, it’s because I want to be a writer/director.  Yes, oh so far from where I was and what I was trained in.  When I think about the huge gap I have to jump across, it stresses me out.  I started this blog with the hopes of reigniting my writing engine, to exercise my writing muscles.  How am I to find a job in an industry that I have no qualifications for?  Most entry level jobs in the film industry, I am way over qualified for as an engineer with 12 years’ experience.  But I still have to try.  I want to be able to look Trystan and Zoey in the eyes and tell them in all earnest to chase after their dreams.  I want them to look at my life and see that I am doing the same.

I’ve never really started going for what I wanted until I married Shelly.  My mindset was always to save money, so don’t get what you really want, just get one that is close enough.  Shelly was the first person to tell me, well you want the four door, manual transmission Volkswagen Golf, so don’t settle for the one with automatic transmission.  We started doing the Artists’ Way together.   She was also the one who encourages me to pursue my career in the entertainment industry and not to even look at engineering unless I really have no other choice.  I am so thankful to have her in my life, talk about the wind beneath my wings.

Well, I very seldom take leaps of faith this huge.  Now that I have a family to take care of, my paternal instincts of being a provider are kicking in.  Take a deep breath Capt’n Roy.  Yes, when I look in the mirror, I see a man who is in charge of a ship.  I started feeling achy today, the stress in my muscles catching up to me.  I took a shower and laid back down on the couch where I am quarantined.  Before fully resigning to my fate, I got up and just turned on the stove.  I chopped up some bacon and browned garlic in the oil.  I added some brown sugar to caramelize the bacon and garlic, then added onions.  I continued to make my family a pasta dinner.

The secret, I discovered in doing something is just to do it.  When I think about something I have to do, it stresses me out.  Chores, work, and punishments are things you think about.  Habits are things you don’t have to think about, you just do them.  Here are some habits that I didn’t have one year ago: getting the kids ready every morning, cleaning the table, washing the dishes, cooking meals, cleaning the house and a whole lot of others.  Some I am still working on not thinking about since they get me all aggravated and pissy.  Cooking is a habit, one that I used to get my mind off the aches.  Blogging, is almost a habit.  It took a little bit of effort to sit down and type this.  But then again that’s one of my goals.  To make writing a habit.

I tip my hat to single mothers, single fathers, stay home moms, working parents and those of you out there who handle your habits (good and bad) with grace.  Thanks to all the positive and inspiring bloggers.  Keep writing.  You guys give me inspiration and steam to keep going.

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